Saturday, December 31

Jazzy on football

Chloe asked Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat do you like to watch football on T.V?” Jazzy replied, “I, your agile and mercurial Jazzy Cat, do not care much for football because of the discrimination by humans against felines playing the game. The speed and moves we have would simply be too much for humans and our larger cousins (lions & tigers) would be rather awesome at opening holes for running backs. It is obvious that we could make gazillions of dollars and a team like the Detroit Lions would take on a whole new personality.” Due to her character flaw, Chloe immediately thought of a class action lawsuit. She said, “Jazzy why don’t we see if the Sleaze, Grime, Smut, Crumb & Associates law firm could help us secure our civil rights so we could play football?” The process of sanctification is indeed plagued by backsliding. So, I approached Chloe slowly and slapped her upside the head with my paw. My meaning was clear…. Feline dignity does not allow us to stoop to such human folly.

Friday, December 30

WLIE-TV wants interview with Jazzy Cat

Chloe reported to Jazzy that WLIE-TV wanted to interview her about her commentary on Judge Sleaze. Chloe said, “Jazzy, I received a call from their top reporter, Lefty Leaner, requesting that I obtain an interview with you. They promised me a case of my favorite treats if I could successfully get your approval. Do you want to do it?” I, your humble and quick-witted Jazzy Cat, responded, “These liberal media outlets, such as WLIE, can absolutely chew you up and spit you out by editing your comments and taking them out of context. They use this technique early and often to paint the picture that suits their bias. I know that my views are in opposition to theirs; therefore, I will only be interviewed if they agree to run the entire interview unedited. Without this guarantee, their hatchet job would probably cost me two or three lives and I only have nine.” Chloe could see the treats evaporating before her eyes as she walked away.

Thursday, December 29

Jazzy thinks liberalism may be a mental illness

Chloe was very meditative as she approached Jazzy and said, “Jazzy, I am flabbergasted by how many liberals are upset because President Bush authorized the spying of terrorists telephone calls from overseas into the U.S.A. This could prevent literally millions of Americans from being killed, and there has not been a single reported incident of an abuse of this authority that has affected anyone’s freedom. Yet these liberals are outraged. Amazingly, these are the same people who were all for the socializing of medical care in this country a decade ago. Had it passed it would have had severe consequences on the freedom of everyone that would ever need a doctor. This of course would have been everyone. Where was there concern then? Jazzy, I do not understand liberals, do you?” I, your perplexed, Jazzy Cat had to admit that I did not understand the illogical reasoning of liberal thinking. After a brief moment of meditation, I said to Chloe, “Chloe, I really think that liberal thinking is so inconsistent and contradictory that it is a mental disorder much like schizophrenia? Maybe someday they will find a cure because these people are so filled with anger that it can’t possibly be healthy.”

Wednesday, December 28

Jazzy tells Chloe about Senator Porkie Drum

I, your humble and supreme feline, was very proud of the way that Chloe was progressing under my expert tutelage. Today, she asked me if some of the legislation that was passed by the U.S. Congress was full of back scratching projects. I simply referred Chloe to the current U.S. budget that contained 2 billion dollars for a bridge to nowhere in Alaska. Alaska’s Republican senator Porkie Drum has fought long and hard to get the bridge in the budget bill. The senators and congressmen that deliver these kinds of projects are honored in their home districts for ‘bringing home the bacon’. Unfortunately for taxpayers the bacon comes right out of their freezers. The really alarming thing is that ultimately it could effect the quality of the bacon that we felines receive for our most excellent service. Now this hits close to home and they have the nerve to call us cats ‘cunning’.

Tuesday, December 27

Jazzy explains campaign contributions

After meditating on Jazzy Cat’s analysis of the Sleaze judgeship appointment, Chloe asked Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat, do you think that Mr. Sleaze had to pay off Governor U.O. Cash to receive that appointment to the bench?” I, your humble and insightful Jazzy Cat, was so proud of my less than gifted sister Chloe as she, with my help, was beginning to connect the dots. I humbly replied, “Yes Chloe, in the case of Mr. Sleaze, you can take it to the bank. However, these things can be handled quite legally in the form of campaign contributions. Even if per person contribution limitations are applicable, Mr. Sleaze and an unlimited number of his family and friends can each give the maximum. Mr. Sleaze can then give gifts and favors to his relatives and friends to reimburse them. Chloe, the bottom line is that there is a whole lot of back scratching going on. That is why appointments to jobs, pardons, favors, etc. sometimes require a ‘campaign contribution’. These contributions will always be given because of a professed interest in good government. It never ceases to amaze me when a human being says that cats are conniving.”

Monday, December 26

The Honorable Mr. Sleaze receives judicial appointment

Chloe was literally out of breath as she came running up to Jazzy and said, “Jazzy Cat, I just heard on the local CBS affiliate WLIE-TV that the Honorable I.R. Sleaze has just been appointed to a judgeship by our Democat Governor U.O. Cash. He is to fill out the remainder of the term of the recently deceased Judge D.O. Wright who was respected and loved for his honesty. Governor Cash said in the interview that Mr. Sleaze had an outstanding record as a lawyer fighting for the rights of the little man. Jazzy, he is really going to sock it to us for our comments about him this past Friday.” I your humble and streetwise Jazzy Cat responded, “Au contraire Chloe, Mr. Sleaze will be up for election in a couple years and the last thing he wants exposed is the real truth about his supposed help of the ‘little man’. He does not want that issue to see the light of day because, while his ambulance chasing frivolous lawsuits have helped an extremely small percentage of working class people, He has harmed the overwhelming majority of them by causing higher insurance rates. The inevitable results of junk lawsuits are higher insurance rates for homes, vehicles, health, etc. This is a bad day for everyone that pays insurance premiums as a former ambulance chasing trial lawyer like Mr. Sleaze will make his court a venue shopping gold mine for his trial lawyer brethren.”

Sunday, December 25

Christmas Day

Christmas Day. Praise God today as we celebrate the birth of the incarnation of the son of God, Jesus Christ. God was pleased to do this so that all who believe in and trust Jesus Christ as he is presented in the gospel would be saved from their sin and have eternal life. What amazing Grace this is for the creator of the universe to reach out and secure salvation for believers by the life and death of his one and only son Jesus Christ. We look back on this event with thanksgiving and the Old Testament writers who were inspired by the Holy Spirit looked forward to this event. Yes, he was a great ethical teacher. This has saved no one; however, his perfect life and atonement on the cross of Calvary as a substitutionary atonement for those that trust in his name has and will save many.

Saturday, December 24

Jazzy Cat meditates on Christmas Eve

I, your humble Jazzy Cat, have inside information that Pastor Tim will be preaching on the glorious first chapter of John’s gospel as we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. Verse 1-13 will be the text on Christmas eve and verse 14-18 will be the Sunday morning text. These gloriously theologically rich verses are as follows:
1In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2He was with God in the beginning. 3Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4In him was life, and that life was the light of men. 5The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it. 6There came a man who was sent from God; his name was John. 7He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all men might believe. 8He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light. 9The true light that gives light to every man was coming into the world.
10He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. 11He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. 12Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—13children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God. 14The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. 15John testifies concerning him. He cries out, saying, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’” 16From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. 17For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. 18No one has ever seen God, but God the One and Only, who is at the Father’s side, has made him known.

Friday, December 23

I.R. Sleaze upset over being labeled a rat defender

Chloe was very anxious as she asked Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat, I think we are in more trouble than we have ever been in because I just heard from the honorable I.R. Sleaze and he is furious that you implied that he would defend rats on your blog yesterday. He said that he may be an ambulance chaser to a degree, but he would never stoop to defending rats like that socialist radical Ramsey Clark who is over in Iraq defending that Saddam guy. What are we going to do?” Jazzy Cat responded, “Chloe this is the Christmas season. Let me get back to you when I have formulated my strategy to get out of this without even using one of my nine lives.”

Thursday, December 22

Chloe briefly considers voting for the Democats

Chloe asked Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat, do you know who I would vote for if cats voted?” I, your all knowing and all caring, Jazzy Cat responded, “Chloe Cat, who would you like to vote for?” Chloe had already dozed off, but she replied, “I believe I like those Democats and would vote for them. What do you think?” I thought a minute as I knew that I must provide the leadership and discernment for my dim-witted sister Chloe. She needed an example that she could visualize and understand. So, I said, “Chloe, do you remember those field mice of the rodent family that we, with the blessing of WH and DH, went outside of our house and hunted them down and killed them? It saved our house from being invaded from the random damage that they do.” Chloe said, “Jazzy what has this got to with voting for Democats?” I replied, “Chloe, If Democats were in charge, they would not allow us to hunt them down outside, but make us wait until they came in and caused damage before we did anything. Then they would want to provide them with lawyers like our ole buddy, I.R. Sleaze. On top of that they would want WH and DH to pay for their lawyers.” After a long pause, Chloe said, “I have flip-flopped on my opinion, I don’t think I would ever vote for the Democats.” Jazzy smiled knowingly and meditated on how fortunate Chloe was to have such a brilliant sister.

Wednesday, December 21

Jazzy suggests gifts

Chloe asked Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat, do you think we should get WH and DH a gift for Christmas?” I, your humble Jazzy Cat, told Chloe that I overheard DH telling WH what wonderful feet warmers cats are so I guess you could sleep next to their feet more often. I said to Chloe, "As for me, Jazzy Cat supreme’o, my mere presence is a gift and that makes me the gift that keeps on giving…."

Tuesday, December 20

Jazzy educates Chloe on cat/human psychology 101

Chloe finally woke up after sleeping nearly all day yesterday. She said, “Jazzy Cat, do you think WH and DH are trying to tell us something with all those new scratching posts they have placed around the house?” I, your humble Jazzy Cat, responded with as much sensitivity as I could muster, “Yes, Chloe, they do not want us scratching on the carpet and furniture and that is why we have all these scratching posts. We should comply most of the time but not all of the time. Obeying their wishes all of the time sets a bad precedent in that they will expect total obedience all of the time on more and more of our activities. Pretty soon we would be acting like common dogs and seeking to please them at every turn. Chloe we cannot live with such a relationship as that so we need to disobey them occasionally, and it is important to show real displeasure when they correct us. It is called cat/human psychology 101. It separates us from dogs and the amazing thing is that they love us for it.”

Monday, December 19

Jazzy explains real motives of insensitivity complainers

I could not believe the news that Chloe had for me. She said, “Jazzy Cat, we heard from the University of Kentucky and they offered a compromise on their use of ‘wildcats’ as a mascot which insults us felines (see Dec. 14 post). They said they could change the name of their football team to the ‘mildcats’, but they really want to keep the name ‘wildcats’ for their basketball team. They said they would donate one dollar for every point they scored in basketball to the animal rescue league to make up for the feline slur.” I, your humble Jazzy Cat, once again am amazed about how people think that this type of complaint that was filed by our former legal representative, Mr. I.R. Sleaze, is really about us being truly offended. Let me spell it out for all you ‘diversity & sensitivity’ activists who seek to be politically correct, all-inclusive and inoffensive… It is not about being offended by most of those who claim to be offended; it is all about seeking money, power, promotions, publicity, political advantage, sympathy, legislation, etc. Get a grip folks. My much less intelligent feline sister Choe understands this.

Sunday, December 18

Discernment is needed to combat false prophets

The Bible teaches that there will be false prophets teaching false doctrine and that true Christians should beware and test everything with Scripture. These false teachers will distort Scripture as well as use their imaginations to dream up unbiblical false principles and the Bible very clearly teaches us to use discernment so as not to be fooled. I am not referring to minor disagreements such as mode of Baptism, but major core doctrines such as the deity of Christ and the way to have eternal life. The following three Photo Meditations have more to say on this subject:
False Prophets ....... Revelation or Imagination ...... Discernment

Saturday, December 17

Jazzy explains the need for discernment of information

Chloe approached Jazzy and said, “Jazzy Cat, you have done a great job of exposing exactly who and how irrational some of these radical activist are in the last two days. They are anti-American to the core and the information directly from their websites proves it. You have also explained why the liberal mainstream media does not expose their entire radical agenda, since they agree with many of these activist causes. Do you think very many hard working American citizens realize the propaganda and manipulation that these organizations are successfully accomplishing with the aid of the MSM?” I, your scholarly Jazzy Cat, told Chloe, “I think they are able to propagandize an alarming percentage of people with the aid of the MSM. However, there are many sources available especially on the internet that are exposing these agendas. It is up to every person to be sure that they are discerning about all of the information they receive. That also applies to religion and Christianity as we will discuss tomorrow.”

Friday, December 16

Chloe asks about the International Socialist Organization

Chloe finally woke up after sleeping nearly all day yesterday. She said, “Jazzy Cat, why do you think the International Socialist Organization, that admits on their website that the U.S.A. has fantastic wealth, think socialism would be a better economic system. They know the U.S.A. has a capitalistic, free enterprise economic system which produces this wealth. Where is their shining example of a prosperous socialistic country? Do you think they just cannot connect the dots?” I, your scholarly Jazzy Cat, responded, “Chloe, obviously facts mean nothing to these people. While the MSM keeps them as hidden as possible they are present, vocal, and even involved in organizing many of the demonstration of radical organizations and causes. Anti-death penalty, anti-war, feminism, environmental, animal rights, global warming, homelessness, pro-abortion are just a few of the causes they get involved with. They are anti-American as their website makes very clear and will latch on to any cause that makes the U.S.A. look bad whether true or not. The following is another quote from their website:
A world free of exploitation--socialism--is not only possible but worth fighting for. The ISO stands in the tradition of revolutionary socialists Karl Marx, V.I. Lenin and Leon Trotsky in the belief that workers themselves--the vast majority of the population--are the only force that can lead the fight to win a socialist society. Socialism can't be brought about from above, but has to be won by workers themselves.
Since the left wing MSM agrees with most of the causes they are involved with they provide them cover on who they are and what they stand for.”

Thursday, December 15

Jazzy Cat exposes stupidity of socialism

Chloe slept in today as she was depressed over how much the lawyer I.R. Sleaze was able to manipulate her. So I, your humble and supremely gifted Jazzy Cat, did a little web surfing and came across some photos posted on ‘Little Green Footballs’ of the anti-death penalty demonstrations a couple of days ago in California. One of the groups demonstrating was the International Socialist Organization. The following two paragraphs are contradictory quotes from their website where they acknowledge that capitalistic U.S.A. enjoys fantastic wealth yet blame the misery of millions of people world wide on capitalism:
"The misery that millions of people around the world face is rooted in the society we live in--capitalism, where the few who rule profit from the labor of the vast majority of the population.
In the U.S., a tiny proportion of the population enjoys fantastic wealth, while millions of people live in desperate poverty, and many more live paycheck to paycheck. Yet we have the resources to feed, clothe and educate everyone on the planet."

I realize these people are not on a first name basis with logic, as is your humble Jazzy Cat. But, using their own conclusion, it would logically follow to me that maybe the world needs more capitalism, and freedom of their own not the failed economic system of socialism…. You know kinda like the U.S. is attempting to do in Iraq.

Wednesday, December 14

Chloe and Jazzy sue University of Kentucky

Chloe reported to Jazzy that she had heard from her lawyer the honorable I.R. Sleaze (see Nov. 12, 2005 post). She said, “Jazzy Cat, I know you do not like Mr. Sleaze, but he has an idea that could net all of us some really big bucks. He said that the University of Kentucky’s athletic teams are called the wildcats. Teams that have insensitive ethnic related mascot names such as Braves, Warriors, Indians, etc, are already under fire according to Mr. Sleaze. Therefore, a team that suggests that cats are wild is the ultimate insensitive and derogatory team mascot. He proposes suing them for several million dollars on our behalf with a settlement plan that would allow us to have royalties on all of their ‘wildcat’ merchandize sales such as hats, shirts, etc. If that is successful he says we can get guard dog Chief a bulldog for an assistant and then go after Mississippi State. What do you think?” I, your humble Jazzy Cat, just shook my head in disbelief and slapped her upside the head. My meaning was clear… Tell your ambulance chasing Mr. Sleaze to go take a hike with all due apologies for being insensitive to hikers.

Tuesday, December 13

Jazzy explains accountability

Chloe asked Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat why are many of the people that oppose the death penalty for violent criminals also the ones that are for the killing of unborn babies by abortion? This seems inconsistent to me.” Jazzy replied, “Although it is inconsistent in regards to death, it is consistent in the respect that both positions are in opposition to personal accountability. The death penalty is the ultimate imposition of accountability and abortion prevents the accountability of an unwanted pregnancy. That is why the secular post-modern culture endorses and embraces the thinking that people are victims in whatever adversity comes their way. No matter how irresponsible the behavior, this inclination will seek to blame negative consequences on something or somebody else. However, we cats know that we must be responsible for our circumstances which is why I, your humble Jazzy Cat, takes care to ensure that the bond of affection that WH and DH have for me is nurtured.”

Monday, December 12

Chloe asks Jazzy for reconciliation

Chloe approached me with tears in her eyes and said, “Jazzy Cat I am so sorry we had that cat fight the other day and got into name calling. I was hurt when you called me a common alley cat, but then I remembered that in my anger, I had called you an intolerant liberal. Do you think we could make up?” While I, your resplendent Jazzy Cat considered my answer, I basked in the fact that Chloe was basically being submissive to my leadership. All was right with the world as I was once again called upon to provide guidance and consolation for my sister Chloe. Without further hesitation I gave her a magnanimous response in keeping with my impeccable character. Chloe responded, “Oh Jazzy Cat, you are so wonderful.”

Sunday, December 11

Grace and sin

Last Sunday’s Bible lesson (Dec. 4) was about how God saves sinners to eternal life and it prompted Chloe to ask, “Jazzy Cat, since WH is redeemed by faith in Jesus alone, does that mean that he can sin with reckless abandon?” Photo Meditation # 25 on Antinomianism covers this thoroughly.

Saturday, December 10

Jazzy and Chloe get into fight

Yesterday D.H. brought home a feline sleeping pad that had a zipper pouch containing catnip. I, your humble Jazzy Cat the preeminent cat of the house, was extremely stimulated by the alluring aroma of the enclosed catnip. To my surprise Chloe, who was also stimulated, challenged me for the introductory exploratory rights to the pad, and a brief altercation ensued which included the exchange of paw jabs to the head. I of course prevailed, but Chloe as she retreated said, “Jazzy Cat you are just an intolerant liberal that wants to impose your dominion and world view on me.” I your humble Jazzy Cat am usually unflappable, but that insult penetrated to my core. Just because I want to be boss, set the agenda, and the household world-view, she called me a liberal. I knew it wasn’t true, but I had the horrifying thought that maybe I was behaving like a liberal. My self-confidence began to erode in real measurable time and I realized that I must get a grip on the reality that I was a much superior cat than a common alley cat like Chloe.

Friday, December 9

Jazzy explains lack of tolerance from liberals

Chloe was very puzzled by the way liberal students at the University of Connecticut treated an invited conservative speaker by shouting her down and shortening her speech. So she asked Jazzy Cat, “Jazzy, why are liberals, who claim to be tolerant and huge advocates of free speech, the very ones who shout down and in effect censor freedom of speech at colleges and universities.” I responded, “Chloe cat, their tolerance only extends to ideas and thoughts that fit their world view. They have zero tolerance for views that do not conform to this world-view template. Ideas and thinking that fit their template are considered politically correct and freedom of speech is celebrated for these views. Thoughts and ideas that do not fit this world-view template are labeled as hateful, insensitive, dangerous, unjust, etc. and therefore need to be silenced. Since they have embraced tolerance for the lewd, vile, profane and pornographic practices in our society, anything that even hints at values, standards, morality, accountability, etc. receives their wrath and condemnation. Speech and thought that does not threaten their activities, behavior, and political thinking are welcomed into their political correct sphere. Conversely, anything that is a threat to these values is not welcomed.”

Thursday, December 8

Jazzy Cat offers character advice to human beings

After meditating on my conversation with Chloe cat about crisis management, it occurred to me how many crisis events could be eliminated if humans would be more interested in their character traits instead of being concerned about having a falsified favorable reputation. I am pleased to report that we cats care passionately about our personality and character and have little regard for seeking approval and having a misleading favorable reputation. For example, when I your humble Jazzy cat am lounging in my window enjoying the view and WH and DH come home, I can be true to my character and continue to enjoy my view and ignore them, or I can be as phony as a three dollar bill and run over to them seeking approval and a good reputation. The choice is sincerity and truth verses a shallow fraudulent misleading display intended for reputation enhancement only. Sincerity will always be the choice that we magnificently created cats will take.

Wednesday, December 7

Chloe suggests retaining crisis management consultant

After a long nap and meditation, Chloe became apprehensive about all the conflicts that had arisen over Jazzy Cat’s taking such controversial stands on her blog. Outing guard dog Chief, slandering the main stream media, making PETA angry, rejecting the authority of the PC police, and ethnic insensitivity in using the term Mexican standoff are just a few of the controversies that Jazzy had caused. So, Chloe said to Jazzy, “Jazzy Cat I think we need a crisis management consultant to come in and help with public relations until all these issues you have created are forgotten.” I, your humble Jazzy Cat, called Chloe into a private conference and explained to her that I was indeed an expert in crisis management in my own right and didn’t need other experts. I said, “Chloe cat, the great principle to remember in crisis management is to find wiggle room and the great example of this is the famous statement and I quote, ‘It depends on what the meaning of is is.’” Chloe left my presence in a state of awe!

Tuesday, December 6

Chloe discusses getting a Christmas tree

Chloe seemed to have a new twinkle in her eye as she now had a hope of heaven (see Dec. 3 & 4 posts). She approached Jazzy cat and asked, “Jazzy, I am so happy and I think we need to get a Christmas tree this year. Or, should it now be called a holiday tree so as to not be offensive?” I your gifted but humble Jazzy Cat thought long and hard about how to best explain to Chloe how the American culture had reached such an absurd state of denying our own heritage to pacify anyone who may disagree. I finally decided that it cannot be said any more concisely than the Apostle Paul said it in Romans 1:22. I assured Chloe that WH, DH and this blog were going to openly celebrate and proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ without apology.

Monday, December 5

Chloe encouraged by Sunday’s Bible lesson

Chloe has really been in a good mood since she found out that WH’s salvation did not depend on his works of righteousness but on his faith and trust in the perfect righteousness of Jesus Christ (See my Dec. 3 post for more background). Since she is a curious cat by nature she did ask me the following question, “Jazzy Cat, since WH is redeemed by faith in Jesus alone, does that mean that he can sin with reckless abandon?” This was a very good question by Chloe and I told her that we would cover that question in next Sunday’s Bible lesson. I your humble Jazzy Cat am so pleased that I can be of such service to my intellectually challenged sister Chloe.

Sunday, December 4

How God saves sinners to eternal life

As I began to explain to Chloe yesterday, the righteousness that is required for sinners to stand before God on judgment day is provided by God through Jesus Christ to sinners as a free gift. This is the amazing grace of eternal life that we sing about. The perfect life of Jesus Christ provides the righteousness that is needed by sinners and his death on the cross pays the debt that is owed by sinners. Saving faith is the means or instrument that gives sinners access to this grace. Photo Meditation numbers 3, 6, 9, 10, & 15 give more detail and scripture verses on these principles. The Photo Meditations link directly below and on the left side will link directly to the Photo Meditation index.

Saturday, December 3

Chloe wonders if cats can go to heaven

Chloe got really serious and asked me if animals and more especially cats would go to heaven. I told Chloe that a prominent Christian scholar had said that, although the Bible did not speak on the subject, he certainly hoped that pets of true Christians would be there. Chloe immediately became depressed and replied, “Jazzy Cat, we are doomed if we have to depend on WH getting us there because he is such a sinner. It is plain to see that he sins and falls short of God’s righteous standard every single day. I am afraid that his good works will not be good enough for him to earn justification before God.” I told Chloe that she was right that the life and deeds of WH was not sufficient for him to gain entrance into heaven. But, while God requires perfect righteousness for a person to stand justified before him, he provides an amazing way in which that can be accomplished. I said, “Chloe cat, the Bible lesson tomorrow will explain exactly how that is accomplished.”

Friday, December 2

Jazzy accused of ethnic insensitivity!

While I was relaxing and gazing out of our front window, Chloe approached me cautiously and said, “Jazzy Cat, I can not believe you have made another group mad at you so soon after the PETA incident. We have been inundated with calls and e-mails from several ethnic insensitivity watchdog groups for your use of the term ‘Mexican standoff’ in yesterdays blog. What were you thinking? Instead of Mexican standoff, couldn’t you have said, ‘the snake and I had a multi-culture conflict in desperate need of resolution?’” I your humble Jazzy cat, being skilled in cat to cat interaction, never stopped gazing out the window as I did a semi split-S maneuver and slapped Chloe upside the head. My meaning was clear….. don’t be intimidated by the PC police!

Thursday, December 1

Jazzy reflects on PETA and copperhead intruder

Chloe was so traumatized by PETA yesterday that she slept all day. So I was able to reflect on the PETA incident and the following statement that is on the PETA website: The wild animals you see in your backyard aren’t trespassing—it’s their home too. This insanity reminded me of this past June when WH and DH left Chloe and me outside while they went to the store. We were lounging on the front porch when we saw this snake slithering across our driveway toward our front yard. I moved up to within about eight feet to investigate and my sixth sense told me to be cautious. Chloe remained safely on the deck. I guess you might say that the snake and I had a Mexican standoff. Well WH and DH drove up about that time and WH slammed on the brakes, got out, hollered at me to get back, and went and got a shovel and beat that snake very much like it was trespassing, armed, and dangerous. I heard WH tell DH that it was a copperhead and very poisonous. I guess, to please PETA, I should have said, “welcome home Mr. Copperhead.” The PETA people need a serious dose of catnip if you ask me your humble and brilliant Jazzy Cat.